The new 'assertive' me

Three of my best qualities are that I’m nice, sensitive and easy going. Three of my worst qualities are that I’m nice, sensitive and easy going.

That’s who I have been from the very beginning. My identity has been molded. Sure, we all change as we grow, but who we are to the core, that never changes. Or that’s what I thought, till today. I had to teach myself that if I can’t adapt myself to my surroundings, then I’m never gonna last. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that I’m changing me or attempting to be someone I’m not. (Ok fine... maybe a little... only sometimes, though)

Let me tell what happened. Picture this. Nice, sensitive, easy-going me is spending the whole evening shopping. And today was no cakewalk shopping. I’m talking pushing and shoving and everything of the kind. I found myself saying “it’s ok” to the lady who shoved me before I realized that she hadn’t even apologized.

Anyway, I am finally in the checkout line at this shopping place and it’s totally crowded. Although there are about five lines open, each one is packed with people. But, I’m almost to the front of my line, and the cashier beckons me over, when out of nowhere the customer BEHIND me pushes past me to steal my spot! What I usually would have done was to hang my head down and let the woman pass. But today I did not find that in me. I firmly tapped her on her back and said to her, “ excuse me, but I believe that I was next in line”. And then I took my rightful position at the available register. And as I faced the cashier, I wore a proud grin on my face and I half expected him to applaud me. Hell, I half expected the entire store to applaud me. After all, this was the VERY first time, of all the times this very it has happened to me in various movie theaters, restaurants and shopping places, that my walked-all-over-self acted in an assertive way.

The best part is that I don’t think I even thought about it. It was completely instinctual ! So, not that I’m saying I’ve suddenly become a rude, crass person but just that I’ve learned to stand up for myself and oh my god, does it feel good! So, the moral of the story is don’t mess with me. I won’t let you get away with it. Not any longer, at least.